Jonathan Livingston Seagull loved to fly, loved it so much that he went against its own flock to reach for the sky.
Yet we find fewer Jonathans soaring in the skies above because society wants conformity, has its beliefs and expectations. Many buddingJonathans face the harsh reality soon as they start going to school, around their neighborhood, and even at their homes. In lieu of protecting the ones whom we care about, we put our own insecurities and biases onto them and increase their self doubt and hold their independence. Rather than giving them freedom and choice to fly, we ground them onto the reality of the situation and make them have realistic expectations.
To groom the next Jonathan, realize first that each of us are unique and talented in our own ways. At times, its best to just let individuals to follow their intuition, learn from their experiences, and let them achieve their authentic greatness.
Creativity is hard to define. Each one of us is creative – that creativity can be seen at our homes, workplaces, the hobbies we have, the activities we do, and it can be anywhere and everywhere.
What type of environment helps in facilitating creativity could be a more interesting question to ask. In my experience, the initial moments of feedback given to an individual who is exploring her or his creativity is critical. In those initial moments, the words and behavior (feedback/response) absorbed by the individual will shape how he or she sees creativity and the world around them. These earlier experiences can form a narrative and a fixed or growth mindset can be set towards creativity which can have a profound effect in the individual’s ensuing years. Creativity is a muscle and it gets better through exercises and engagements.
All of us are creative in our own unique ways. Change the narrative, change the outcome!
Albert Einstein once said “Don’t think about why you question, simply don’t stop questioning. Don’t worry about what you can’t answer, and don’t try to explain what you can’t know. Curiosity is its own reason. Aren’t you in awe when you contemplate the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure behind reality? And this is the miracle of the human mind-to use its constructions, concepts, and formulas as tools to explain what man sees, feels and touches. Try to comprehend a little more each day. Have holy curiosity.”
Each individual has internal superpowers. These superpowers are unique and developed through our personal experiences, environment, and evolution. Storytelling is one of our authentic superpowers.
Each individual can define “success” in their own terms and go towards reaching their authentic greatness.
If each of us realize and tap into our internal superpowers, live our authentic greatness, then collectively we will create a better and evolved world.
Every human activity, endeavor, or career path involves the mastering of skills. – Robert Greene in “Mastery”
Robert Greene – Mastery
In his book Mastery, Robert Greene elaborates on the Apprenticeship phase involving three essential steps in the apprenticeship, each one overlapping the other. The three steps are: Deep Observation (The Passive Mode), Skills Acquisition (The Practice Mode), and Experimentation (The Active Mode). He states that within Skills Acquisition (The Practice Mode), in acquiring any kind of skill, there exists a natural learning process that coincides with the functioning of our brains known as tacit knowledge – a feeling for what you are doing that is hard to put into words but easy to demonstrate in action. He elaborates on how the apprenticeship system came about in the Middle Ages. “As business expanded in the Middle Ages, Masters of various craft needed more help and also wanted to build up skills in their workers. Thus the apprenticeship system developed in which young people from approximately the ages of twelve to seventeen would enter work in a shop, signing a contract that would commit them for the term of seven years. At the end of seven years, apprentices would have to pass a master test, or produce a master work, to prove their level of skill. Once the apprentices’ pass, they were elevated to the rank of journeymen and could travel wherever there was work, practicing the craft. “
Apprentice comes from the Latin word prehendere, meaning to grasp with the hand. “Apprentices learned the trade by watching Masters and imitating them very closely and learning through a lot of endless repetition and hands-on work with very little verbal instruction. Since resources such as textiles, wood, and metals were expensive and could not be wasted on practice runs, apprentices would spend most of their time working directly on those materials used for the final product. If the time was summed up for which the apprentices ended up working directly on materials in those years, it would amount to more than 10,000 hours, enough to establish exceptional skill level at a craft.”
“The most important thing business leaders must do today is to be the “chief question-asker” for their organization” says Dev Patnaik of Jump Associates.
Patnaik says that “the first thing most leaders need to realize is, they’re really bad at asking questions. The business executives rose up through the corporate ranks because “they were good at giving answers. But it means they’ve had little experience at formulating questions.” Without the company leadership setting the tone and culture to the rest of the organization that asking questions are important and critical to the business growth, it’s no surprise that the employees are not asking any or enough questions. If the employees who understand the company’s products/services are not asking any or enough questions to the customers/end users for feedback, or asking questions to explore new products/services in the market, the company will become stagnant and the competition will take over.
Adam Bryant, The New York Times Corner Office Column writer says that “the best leaders understand that asking open, exploratory questions can help them figure out what’s coming and where new opportunities lie, so that they can lead their company in new directions.” Leaders have to show vulnerability and humility to ask questions which is more important than upholding the persona of the leader who must “be all-knowing, decisive, and in possession of infallible gut instincts, all of which leaves little room for questioning.”
Are you the company’s “Chief Question-Asker”?
Quotes are from “A More Beautiful Question” by Warren Berger
I saw Michael Jordan in person for the first time in my life. He was about to go on stage with Vanessa Bryant and induct my favorite player of all time, Kobe Bryant into the Basketball Hall of Fame. This particular event was part of the Enshrinement Weekend, where the new class to the Hall of Fame is honored and joins the ranks of Basketball’s Finest. It was a memorable basketball event that Anshu and I had ever attended at Mohegan Sun on May 15, 2021.
I already knew that Michael Jordan was going to induct Kobe Bryant into the Basketball Hall of Fame. I don’t know why I seemed surprised when I ACTUALLY saw Jordan in the same arena as I was in. As long as I have been following the NBA since the early 2000s, Michael Jordan’s name has been synonymous with greatness and considered to be one of the greatest players of all time. It felt right that Kobe picked his favorite player to induct him into the ranks of Basketball’s Elite.
I vividly remember everything that happened that day. I was very excited and did not want to miss any moment of seeing a current or former player, coach, sports announcer or someone from the basketball world that I have seen on TV walk around the halls of Mohegan Sun. I even brought my Kobe book, “Kobe Bryant The Mamba Mentality” in case I wanted to get it signed. I am not sure whom I was planning to get that book signed by, but I felt that if I carry it to the event, I would meet someone who would.
After picking up our admission tags and basketball swags at the Registration table, Anshu and I walked around the various sections of Mohegan Sun. We saw fans wearing the jerseys of Kobe Bryant, Kevin Garnett, Tim Duncan and others who have come from near and far for this year’s coveted class of basketball icons. I was thinking to myself how special this class of inductees were. The Class of 2020 included 18-time NBA All-Star and five-time NBA champion Kobe Bryant, 15-time NBA All-Star and three-time NBA Finals MVP Tim Duncan, 15-time NBA All-Star and nine-time NBA All-Defensive First Team selection Kevin Garnett, four-time National Coach of the Year Eddie Sutton, two-time NBA Champion coach Rudy Tomjanovich, 10-time WNBA All-Star and four-time Olympic gold medalist Tamika Catchings, three-time NCAA National Championship Coach of Baylor Kim Mulkey, five-time Division II National Coach of the Year Barbara Stevens and longtime FIBA executive Patrick Baumann. The Class of 2020 inductees can definitely be argued as one of the best class yet.
This evening was special as well as bittersweet for me. I loved watching Kobe Bryant play and have been a fan since his early Championship years with the Los Angeles Lakers. However, I never went to see him play in a basketball arena in the 20 years he played in the NBA. That has been my basketball regret and I wanted to be present when Kobe was getting inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame.
Inside the Mohegan Sun Arena where the Enshrinement event took place, it was buzzing with so much energy and excitement. I probably could have stood up the entire event and watched the ceremony, but since it was almost a three hour event, it was better that I got seated. We were scouting the venue to find a former Hall of Famer, current player, or coach. Near the main stage, we saw Magic Johnson, Bill Russell, Kim Mulkey, Gregg Popovich, Tony Parker, Manu Ginoblili, Tamika Catchings, Doc Rivers, Pau Gasol, Nav Bhatia, friends, and families of the Class of 2020 inductees among others. I was soaking in every second of this basketball extravaganza.
Kevin Garnett was the first athlete to get inducted by Isiah Thomas into the Hall of Fame. We enjoyed the highlight reel of KG on the big screen followed by his speech. One by one the coveted members of the 2020 class were coming to the stage and sharing their stories. Although each inductee’s story was unique, I really enjoyed hearing Tamika’s story as it was poignant and memorable. There was even a heart-warming performance by musical artist Ne-Yo.
When Kobe Bryant’s highlight reel came on the main screen, I got emotional. This was the moment that my favorite basketball player would be inducted into the ranks of basketball luminaries. Vanessa Bryant, assisted by Michael Jordan, went to the stage and delivered a heartfelt and personal speech. Kobe’s relentless work ethic, dedication to the game of basketball, and contributions on and off the court had touched millions of lives around the world. I was touched as well and felt sentimental being in the arena to see him get inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame, where he rightfully belonged.
Jim Kwik, author of Limitless says a dominant question is the thing we keep asking ourselves, over and over throughout our day. It’s what drives our decisions in the moment and focuses our obsessions when we’re alone. He says the dominant question feels permanent but it is not.
“The questions you ask yourself will shape your life.” – Jim Kwik
In Entrepreneur magazine (June 2021), Jim shares his experience working with the actor Will Smith. They realized that Will’s dominant question is “How do I make this moment magical?” Jim recalls “One night, he was with Will Smith and his family on a movie set and it was 2am and everyone was freezing. He starts making hot chocolate for everybody, even though there’s a crew there that does that for them. He starts bringing us blankets. He starts cracking jokes. He starts telling stories. And I realized. He’s living his dominant question.”
2 WAYS TO FIND YOUR DOMINANT QUESTION according to Jim Kwik
Review
Listen. Reflect on your thoughts, listen to your inner talk. Sit in silence. Silence isn’t empty, it will be full of your own questions.
Record
Journal every day. Review and record your day, and you’ll start to notice patterns skewing towards the things you find important in your life.
Giving advice to someone is a tough ask. When someone reaches out to you for advice, you are put in a position of authority or power. It could be that the person seeking your advice thinks you are the right person, have the relevant experience, have information that others don’t or for any other reason. In essence, if someone asks for advice, he or she is looking for some sort of an answer from you. It’s a tall order to give accurate and meaningful “advice” to another person.
In his book, WILL, Will Smith says this about advice “The thing I’ve learned over the years about advice is that no one can accurately predict the future, but we all think we can. So advice at its best is one person’s limited perspective of the infinite possibilities before you. People’s advice is based on their fears, their experiences, their prejudices, and at the end of the day, their advice is just that: it’s theirs, not yours. When people give you advice, they’re basing it on what they would do, what they can perceive, on what they think you can do. But the bottom line is, while yes, it is true that we are all subject to a series of universal laws, patterns, tides, and currents – all of which are somewhat predictable – you are the first time you’ve ever happened. YOU and NOW are a unique occurence, of which you are the most reliable measure of all the possibilities.”
A powerful and practical way to approach this situation when someone reaches out to you for advice is to say “I am happy to share with you what has worked for me.” An example of this in real life is to watch this video of Dwayne Johnson “The Rock” speaking to the Los Angeles Lakers as part of their GeniusTalks series, reflecting on his career as an athlete and actor, and sharing lessons he learned along the way.
As a sports fanatic, I’ve devoured the sports documentaries available in various streaming platforms. Some of those documentaries I’ve gone back and watched it again because the stories are told in a riveting way and have had a huge cultural impact.
Here are the sports documentaries or documentaries based on sport figures that I really enjoyed watching (in no particular order).
Tiger (HBO) – Tiger is a two-part documentary offering a revealing look at the rise, fall, and epic comeback of global icon Tiger Woods.
38AtTheGarden(HBO) recognizes a pivotal moment in time for Lin, and celebrates a phenomenon that was bigger than basketball for the world.
Being Serena (HBO) – Being Serena is a documentary series chronicling tennis icon Serena Williams at a pivotal moment in her personal and professional life.
Tony Parker: The Final Shot (Netflix) – This film examines the background and career of Tony Parker, whose determination led him to become arguably the greatest French basketball player.
The Redeem Team (Netflix) – After their shocking performance at the 2004 Olympics, the US men’s basketball team seeks redemption as they pursue Gold at the 2008 Beijing Games.
The Playbook A Coach’s Rules For Life (Netflix) – Coaches with championship résumés share their personal rules for success in sports and life in this reflective and inspiring documentary series.
Untold: Malice at the Palace (Netflix) – Key figures from an infamous 2004 incident between players and fans at an NBA game in Michigan discuss the fight, its fallout and its lasting legacy.
Take the Ball, Pass the Ball (Netflix) – Through firsthand accounts and analysis, this football documentary details the dominance of FC Barcelona from 2008-2012 under manager Pep Guardiola.
Noami Osaka (Netflix) – This intimate series follows Naomi Osaka as she explores her cultural roots and navigates her multifaceted identity as a tennis champ and rising leader.
A Kid from Coney Island (Netflix) – From gifted athlete to professional NBA hooper, Coney Island’s Stephon Marbury navigates the pressures, pitfalls and peaks of his basketball journey.
The Last Dance (Netflix) – This docuseries chronicles the rise of superstar Michael Jordan and the 1990s Chicago Bulls, with unaired footage from an unforgettable 1997-98 season.
I Am Bolt (Prime) – Competing in the 100m and 200m races, Usain Bolt attempts to make history by winning these events for a record third time.
Your energy has immense power. What you put your energy into will create the results accordingly. Being aware of your energy, focusing the energy on your important goals and priorities, and taking utmost care of your energy is crucial to achieving success and getting the results you want.
The Law of Attraction is based on the belief that thoughts are a form of energy and that positive energy attracts success in all areas of life, including health, finances, and relationships. If your mindset is about positive energy and thoughts, it will lead towards positive results and vice versa.
As a salesperson, instead of focusing the energy on only your personal goals (earning high commission and getting a sale as quick as possible), if you focus your energy on actually helping the customers solve their problems and get what they want, the results can be phenomenal. As a manager, if your objective is only about achieving your personal goals above your team’s goals, then you will face continuous challenge. As a coach, if you want to achieve greater success as a team, you have to put the team’s goals ahead of your own. When the focus is on only your personal goals, your drive, motivation and energy will all follow accordingly and you might face more challenges along your path to success. When there is wholehearted focus on your customers’ goals and also your personal goals, the results can be remarkable.
When I approached the day with a single goal in mind and the right energy, I was able to achieve greater success. With a singular focus and making it a priority to helping my customers get what they want, I was amazed to see the overall results. What I focused my energy on completely changed the day and the results I got.
Here are a few books that I found to inspire each of us to ask more questions. These books delve into the power of asking important questions, questions that can change the direction of a person, group, or company and provide insights into using questions as a helpful guide in our personal and professional lives.
Growing up in a household or being in an environment where you get mostly or only positive feedback, you will expect that type of feedback in all areas of your personal and professional life. How helpful is the (mostly or only) positive feedback for the person receiving it in the long run? Is that positive feedback motivating the person or setting up expectations/beliefs that are not really assisting her or him? If only positive feedback is being given by a coach to an athlete/by a parent to a child/by a manager to an employee, then it can be more counterproductive than productive.
Constructive feedback is better for us. We need to know where we are good at and where we need to improve. When we get feedback of our strengths and improvement areas, we can allocate our time, energy, and focus accordingly. If we become tempted to create a perfect world of positive feedback from coaches to athletes, parents to children, and managers to employees, we are being in the fixed mindset. It’s important to adopt a growth mindset which “leads to a desire to learn and therefore a tendency to embrace challenges, persist in the face of setbacks, see effort as the path to mastery, learn from criticism, find lessons and inspiration in the success of others. As a result, they reach ever-higher levels of achievement” (Carol S. Dweck’sMindset: The New Psychology of Success)
Simon Sinek, author of Start With Why and other books says that “asking questions doesn’t mean you’re the stupidest person in the room; it usually means you’re the only one brave enough to speak up.”
Some of the reasons why we aren’t asking enough questions even when we don’t understand the topic of discussion are the beliefs/thoughts/internal questions we have going in our head:
By asking this question(s), will it make me look “stupid”?
Would I look like the person who doesn’t understand this topic if I ask this question?
It’s actually not relevant to me at all so why ask this question.
I am the “expert” or “smartest” person in this room. Why ask questions and make myself look like a beginner?
Do I have the “authority” to ask questions in this group or in this context?
With new adventures, everyday challenges, feedback from others, conversations between employees and managers, and many other moments in our daily experiences, it’s important to keep them in perspective.
Imagine a scenario of a manager giving an employee honest feedback. It’s tempting for the employee to expect all positive feedback from his/her supervisor and vice versa. Yet do we really grow from just positive adulations? If the employee uses the honest feedback to gain awareness of their strengths/improvement areas and then gathers new skills and knowledge, it’s actually much better in the long term for both the employee and the supervisor. On the other hand, if the employee does not have the proper perspective on the manager’s honest feedback, then he/she can feel down, angry, or even hurt by their words or behavior. The same goes when parents are giving honest feedback to their children, coaches talking to their players/teams, teachers talking to their students etc. It’s all about the perspective.
In her book, Mindset: The New Psychology of Success, Carol S. Dweck says it’s tempting to create a world in which we’re perfect and we can choose partners, make friends, hire people who make us feel faultless. But think about it- do you want to never grow? Next time you’re tempted to surround yourself with worshippers, go to church. In the rest of your life, seek constructive criticism.
When we put a lot of focus on the grade in school and college, are we limiting the growth of the students’ learning?
If ultimately the course grade is what matters, then the students will study accordingly and stay within the framework of the course curriculum. In theory, the student’s grade is expected to represent his or her understanding of the course material and a way for teachers to assess the student’s knowledge of the subject matter. This will continue to keep many students incentivized to take classes where they can earn easy A’s and not be as hungry to seek out challenging yet important classes that actually lead to their intellectual growth.
As long as we have GPA’s and scores to measure progress and understanding of a subject matter, it will have its shortcomings. If it’s not going to be on the exam, then why would students put more extra effort than needed or go beyond their coursework. With GPAs and test scores not going anywhere anytime soon, we’re left to ask ourselves:
As a teacher,
how can you instill a hunger for learning beyond the course curriculum?
how can you prepare the students for a future of tomorrow?
how can you support the growth of students who are struggling academically but talented in other areas?
As a parent,
how can you encourage your child/children’s learning and education beyond the school’s course curriculum?
how can you encourage your child/children to ask questions as much as having answers?
how can you prepare your child/children for the future of tomorrow?
As a student,
why are you taking these courses and how will they add value to your long term career?
how can you become more aware of the changing job market and prepare yourself accordingly at school/college?
what are your strength areas and how will you continue to hone them or add more skills to be job market relevant?
